So, I ran into my neighbour last evening. We sat on our stoops in the beautiful spring air, chatting and enjoying each others company. But then he brought up the pigsty that is my back yard. He wanted to know if it would be OK if he could come through our fence and clean up a bit. He said it would be "therapeutic". Well. Hmm. Very tempting to a lazy slob such as myself.

Now my neighbour, let's call him "Junior", and I have rather different approaches to keeping house and garden. His sofas have form-fitting plastic covers. Mine, a blanket of dog and cat hair. A while ago, when I was shop-vaccing them, I was excited to discover my bike lock under one of the seat cushions.

A few years ago, Junior decided to fix up his back yard. Sadly, the first thing that had to go was a crumbling old out-house, which served as a fabulous fence between our two yards. The aging bricks were a lovely backdrop for the honeysuckle, climbing roses, and ivy that survive my haphazard gardening. In its place; a chain-link fence. Not a big deal, considering my prolific and invasive plants, right?

The people behind are invisible, chain-link fence to boot. A tumble of vines so lush and green takes care of that. Oh, and the fig tree. It grows like kudzu, I swear to God. Kudzu, a vine imported from Japan with an excellent work ethic, will cover a cinder block in a day. It's working on covering the South. My fig tree would like to do the same to my yard. And to my neighbours.

The next improvement Junior made to his yard was to tear out all the old rose bushes and plants and pour concrete over the lot of it. Nice, white concrete. He was very happy. He extolled the virtue of a low-maintenance yard. Why, he could just hose it clean! His only problem was with the neighbours on the other side who were growing a nasty weed along their common wall. Some of you may know this plant as Wisteria, a truly lovely vine, if ever there was one. It also loves to travel. As much as the owners pruned it, it wasn't enough for Junior. He confided in me that when it came over his side of the fence, he tossed bleach on it.

I have, in the past, come upon Junior hacking at my adventurous fig tree with a machete when it had poked through our fence. So, today found me in the back yard for the first time this season. I know, shocking. I cut back the fig - have no fear, she'll be back in a week; it's a sure thing. I checked the roses along Junior's side. Many of the shoots were brown, dead. Bleached? I sighed, cut them off, and staked the roses away from the fence. No worries about the honeysuckle, though. The chain-link fence he'd installed had been completely cleared, but for a few withering leaves. The neighbours' Wisteria? Let's just say, if you need to trim yours and you don't own any tools, bleach takes it out.

There is that old saying about good fences making good neighbours. I like healthy plants and friendly neighbours. So it looks to me that at least on Junior's side, a good fence is a nice, clean and clear chain-link.