Dano, how brave of you to share this in detail as you have. What a triumph that you no longer self harm!!

Thankfully I never went down that path although I certainly understand the impulse.

But you're right - self-harm is a temporary fix at best. Like drinking too much or taking drugs to numb yourself out.

In the end, at some point you still wake up sober. Even if its only for a short period of time.

Getting myself into therapy was the best thing I ever did.

There was a part of me that thought I didn't need it. That I shouldn't need that sort of help.

But I did and I still do. And... no matter how long it takes, I'm committed to digging myself out, finding a place of balance.

Hope your holidays, Dano, are relaxing and enjoyable.

Oh Dana please do take care -- and thank you for the honesty.

I read your blog but don't often have enough time to comment.

Love and a hug

You were brace to share that and even braver to stop the cutting and burning.

SVASTI~

You hit the nail on the head with the drug and alcohol abuse. What starts as a momentary pleasure becomes an awful addiction.

The pain can only be helped by examining it. Ignoring it will never let you rise to your potential. Drugs, alcohol and self-harm only strengthen the pain.

I am so glad that you chose the difficult path of therapy. In the long run, it will free you.

Best wishes.

MARY~

Thank you so much. I'll be by to see yours in a bit. I'm running out right now, so I'll have to do that later.

ANON~

I don't actually feel brave about this. It's a part of my life that I regret, but I am quite open about.

The reason that I don't write about it often, and try to hide the scars, is because I worry about the effect on others. I don't want to trigger self-harm and I've found that people who see my scars are upset.

I still need to work on the scab picking and skin ripping, but I've come a long way.

i totally get this. i am a cutter as well (reformed) went to seek help at a local community mental health center once and i will never forget when they wrote in big red letters of all colors..."CUTTER" on my file. that shocked me so much that i wanted that erased from my identity. while i do think about doing it when i am at my very lowest lows...i have been good about not actually doing it in the last decade. it is sort of like an addiction and hard to stop. you feel that pressure and it seems like such a release.

but it is not. it is not the answer.

i want to write about this as a topic on the health site i write for..so many young women ask about this. this is a very poignant topic.

wanted to thank you for your kindness and emotional support this year. you are an amazing person...and i am glad to know you even in this peripheral blogger to blogger way. keep writing...you are absolutely helping so many and that is what it is all about.

peace to you this holiday season...

Hi Dano,

I found you from your comment regarding Abilify on Furious Seasons.

I totally appreciate your comment (above) that you don't feel especially "brave" about sharing these extremely painful and very personal things about yourself.

But for me, personally, I think you ARE very brave in that you are able to bring them to the surface and lay them out there in such a careful and articulate manner. You are discussing some very, very tough stuff here, things that the "average" person might (or, in my experience, always) recoil from.

For people like myself who wrestle with demons unknown to, or not understood by, many, your sharing is a gift.

I hope you enjoy the holiday. And, again, thank you.

Dano,
When I was withdrawing Effexor I had numerous symptoms and one of them was the urge to burn myself with the cigarette.
Didn't do it and also didn't kill myself.
I've translated some informations from US site for a community on a social networking of people who fight the same battle.
I know it's hard.
I've already "met" you on Furious Seasons and on Susan's.
Happy Xmas Dano!
Love,
Ana

Hey Dano, thanks for the comment over at my blog - I'm happy to post it, no worries. I've left you a response there too. :)